A Letter For All Whiny Obama-Hating Conservatives

crybaby

Dear Conservatives…..

OK, my righty friends, I think it’s long past time that we clear a few things up. First of all, it really IS a fact that Obama won the Presidency, and NO, you can’t change that, no matter how desperately you try. And you probably should know that to the rest of the country, you know, the rational people, your constant claims of imaginary crimes committed by our first black President only make you sound insane. Perhaps it’s time that you just admit that Obama was a great president and a million times better than the nightmare we’re dealing with now.

Seriously, quit whining and deal with it.

Now obviously, I make no secret of how much I really like Obama. And, truthfully, I find it amusing that so many of you righties absolutely lose your minds over this fact. So, since you apparently just can’t grasp how or why I am so fond of our former POTUS, I thought I’d give you a few reminders. But instead of trying yet again to show you a list of Obama’s greatest accomplishments, and there are many, I thought I’d go with some of the things that you’ve decided were much bigger deals. Because as it turns out…I loved these things too! ┬áPlease try not to let your collective heads explode….

  • He killed Bin Laden
  • His Buzzfeed selfie-stick
  • His Nobel Peace Prize
  • His latte salute
  • His tan suit
  • His chewing gum
  • He’s a Socialist
  • His sneaky magical birth certificate
  • His great sense of humor
  • He brought us Joe Biden!
  • Obamacare
  • Obama phones
  • Being leader of the free world while black
  • “I know, I already won….TWICE”
  • He never invaded the wrong country
  • “Please proceed, Governor”
  • He believes in science
  • His IDGAF attitude toward the Conservatives
  • His swagger
  • He remains the Most Admired Man in America
  • Michelle!
  • He’s not Trump
  • I really could keep going, but I don’t want to send you neo-Cons into a complete bout of the vapors.
    (You’re welcome.)

Your guy may have just won the Electoral College. But over the next three years you are in for the fight of your lives. I’ll wager that by this time next year, you’ll be longing for the good old days of Obama. Bless your tiny little hearts.

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